Breaking Inertia

Cooking

Over the last 11 months, though I keep saying I would start cooking, it never happened. The first person that actually made use of my kitchen was Junyan. That was the start of moving the inertia.

I knew when the 403s come, I could have opted for ordering food in. It is more than 2 years since I really cooked. The inertia was great, but the incentive was greater. I decided to cook. There was alot more work than I could manage. I have certainly slowed down. Age. Sigh. But I still got a few decent dishes out, especially the curry. Nothing makes me happier than to hear, this taste like home-cooked curry. And so it did.

I must get back into form with cooking. sk and zl were looking forward to it. It isnt just cooking, its the marketing, planning, and most of all, it is the remembrance of what makes mum's home a home, her cooking.

Frankly, it didnt turn out the way i wanted ie i had hoped, i could get the whole range of food out like buffet. but alas, my back was breaking, and it was easier to cancel a couple of dishes, and relied on the grill and self-cook stuff.

conversations are as usual, hypothetical, comical, and fun.
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Midnight Walk

Finally, 9 camped overnite. Wanted to bring them to see the very nice bridge, but of course, as usual, my sense of direction was iffy. Didnt take the path I wanted, and well, in the end, we took a long time to reach the bridge. But it was a very nice midnight walk.

I had felt bad not knowing where I was heading; but all the kids were very nice about it. Seriously, they are one of the nicest people around. Thinking, yet easy-going; independent in thought, yet, good listeners and very considerate. If these were my kids, i would really be very fortunate. Just having them as ex-students is itself a joy.


I lived 40 years of my life, with 2 persons that are intolerant of errors and weakness. One could call them perfectionist which they were, but actually, what they show are traits of obsessive compulsive disorder (ocd). Things must be done their way. And anything not in line with the way they want, they showed their unhappiness, with little regard to others. Sometimes causing utter misery. What they see as their 'stand'/ 'standard' is actually, selfishness and self-seeking. If I had led them in the wrong path, and took a much longer route, I would have to bear the brunt of vent and tirade.

That is a very long time to be under such a shackle. And it has its impact. I came across another character, not as strong, but with the same tendencies. That brought alot of unpleasant memories. Thankfully, I was able to struggle out of it, and refuse to be a victim of people with ocd, and be bullied by them.

In that sense, I am always worried about making mistakes that affect others, as i was when I realised I didnt know which way to walk. To be assured again and again by the kids, that it was alright even if we didnt reach our destination, that the company was all everyone enjoyed, there was no goal to reach, no need to think too much (though we did need to get back!), made this walk a very pleasant one for me.

No longer under pressure, under bonds, and expectation. And a few of us saw a falling star. It was memorable to me. And I recalled a similar walk at the start of the year. So actually this year, has started in a pleasant way, and looked like, it is heading toward a pleasant end.

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It was a lovely time. The boys will be enlisted soon. And the girls will be going to uni. This is a precious moment before the diverging path. Seriously, I am really fortunate to have met such wonderfully nice kids.

I am glad to have broken that inertia. I used to be very tough on myself. I have since learnt, no need. Only when one is ready, then move on, and forward.

Thanks, kids, for giving me that incentive to. Just by being yourself.