reflections.....

today, some kids visit....apart from one that i had met 2 weeks ago, hadnt seen the other 5 for a year....so it was lovely seeing them, and we had a good chat for 4 hours or so...

somehow, today, after they have left, there was a sense of sadness...it took me some time to figure out why... 

yes, i was happy it was an open conversation, and i was glad they shared freely of things and people in their lives...perhaps their openness led me to see glimpses of my own days at their age...the leaves of those days turned in my mind....

As i encourage them to venture beyond their comfort zone, to cherish the sweetness of special relationships, to remember their duty towards community...

i wished i have had the same advice .......sigh......i  wished those days could have been so much happier....

one can think too much without being thoughtful....

one can seek for wisdom whilst being in utter folly......

one can be the trap that bind oneself.... 

as i said to them, if i leave my days on earth today, i think i have done what i need and should to the best of my knowledge. I have no regrets.

But, what i didnt say was, there is sadness......

i rarely feel this way....but yes, youth has passed. time cant be turned back. every advice i gave them were words i would have wished i had, every hope i wish for them, every dream before them, i wish, i really wish they would live them because i didnt live my dream....

But i did my duty. And thankfully, by the mercies of the Lord, despite falls, abide by that inward call of conscience to this day. Yet, had my path differed, i know, i would not have been what i presently am, to them, to the many kids that are now part of the tapestry of my life.....

the kids are sweet. very. it is lovely and refreshing to see their youthful zest for life.....i hope they will be very happy....

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In these hazy days, alot of thoughts come to mind. Adversities bring out the worst and best in people. People who clamour for their rights, and hurl acerbic barbs of words are to be pitied.

True living is not about one's own comfort, one's own welfare.  If one never come to the point, that would place the good and welfare of others before oneself (not by words but by deeds), one have not lived.

Life is not merely breath.

That is existence.

Life touches others....