Quote of the day...

Quote of the Day

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

this is the quote of the day in my email today.

When i was 15, Dee gave me a glass plaque, very beautiful, and on it was this quote. I questioned alot from young....over social issues, over issues of humanity, over issues of ideals.

I understood why she gave me this quote. But serenity, courage, and wisdom are qualities that one cannot command.

When I saw this quote again, in some ways, i can say the three elements have cumulated over more than three decades....yes, i have the serenity to know things that cannot be changed, and do have the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. But it is through learning from turmoil of not accepting things I cannot change; through paying the price for not having the courage to change the things I ought to....when I knew i should....and wasted more than ten years.....

It wasnt that God did not grant me the wisdom in the past....i had trusted in the 'wisdom of man' in the name of religion. Indeed, if it was not for the kindness and mercies of God, I could have been trapped for life in the folly of fear.

Not that I should looked back with regret. What is past is past. Through the tempest, I still did do good when i could, and always to consider others.....actually over-consider for others....folly...

So this quote struck a strong inner chord. However wise one can be when young, its age and experience that gives it the depth and resonance......

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i really like working a 4 day week. After Monday, actually the remaining 3 days are almost a breeze, though they are days with the longest working hours. Actually, with just over 9 hour teaching load a week, and the rest optional remedials, left entirely on my own to design my own teachng framework, its really a treat. And rewarding as one sees the effect of the tailored program works.

And now that the kids are more used to me, and I to them, alot more harmony, convergence of purpose, and it is really quite pleasant as the shaping of the mind is beginning to be seen. The earlier frustrations have been well worth, now that i am beginning to reap from the groundwork that had to be laid.

Mornings are also not so stressed, i have my sufficient sleep, and can leave my place at 8, and its still ok. And no worries about anything much once work is over. And no need to attend long meetings, nor any school events! The long drive is the bane, but for the freedom, respect, scope, and the sense of doing good for the community... it is quite worthwhile.

If the kids really will progress and work hard.... and there are many encouraging positive signs.....it would be even more worthwhile.

Although it can be a little lonesome... apart from the kids, and a few people i need to communicate, i can literally walk in and out only talking to kids....and work for hours at my own cubicle, totally on my own... But again, that is fine. I am never good at social settings or making small talks for the sake of it. Work is a good and sufficient companion.

And this way there are no conflicts. I hate conflicts, micro management, and ocd personality. Power and authority can never quell creativity, individuality, diversity and originality.....to attempt to do so renders power powerless ....

But yes, i miss my friends and my buddies...and the kids... sometimes very much, like today......but this was part of the cost i knew i had to pay.......this loss is far far more than material ....

but i always understood opportunity cost...and did count them before embarking....

and anyway, i am used to the ache of loss...and lonesomeness...

The above quote did apply here....